Let’s preface this with, WOAH. This is a little long, and so is the video. Jump straight to 12:30 minute mark if you want!
This is our Ectopic Pregnancy story, what happened, how we dealt with it, and where we’re headed now.
April 18th, We made our first infertility appointment after close to a year and half of trying to conceive. ( and this is the part of the story where everyone stops and says "omg Danielle, I had no idea" Well, of course, you didn't. Because that's MY info to tell people, and If I don't want to I don't have too, and we chose to keep this detail private)
April 28th, We found out we were pregnant.
May 4th, 2019 was supposed to be a day that kicked off my biggest summer wedding calendar yet. Instead, it became the day that we lost our first baby. A day that I almost shot my last wedding ever, a day where had I pushed myself any harder than I already was, this little post could have never been written.
about halfway through that wedding day it happened. BOOM. I immediately felt the pain. Not too alarmed yet, I said to myself, okay Danielle, Well you just found out you're pregnant, and you haven't drank a ton of water today. You're just dehydrated and need to sit down for a minute.
I was in the main restroom for the wedding venue and knew I needed to make it to a more private room, so I managed to make my way back to the bridal suite and lay down, I happened to know the planner for this wedding as she was one of my friends and I asked her for some help. She told my second shooter was happening and she took over immediately. I started feeling worse and worse, I couldn't sit up, or lay down, let alone stand up. My vision was getting darker and darker and all I remember saying is " im just a little dehydrated, I think i’m going to pass out, can I have some water"
B was called and within a few minutes, he was picking me up from the venue and we were headed to the hospital.
as soon as we get there they rush us back and they proceed with an ultrasound. They start checking my vitals, One nurse comes in, then two, a doctor comes in, and then another, the ultrasounds tech leaves, I hear a doctor say "we see something on the ultrasound but we will need to do another one", so they do.
& then all I remember hearing is " she looks pretty pale" I proceed to claim my 70% Irish heritage and tell everyone im always pale and to stop worrying about my color and get me fluids because again, im insisting im just dehydrated and need to return to my wedding.
next thing I know, another ultrasound is being performed, I have IV's in both of my arms and doctors + nurses are going in and out of the room, Brandon is signing consent forms for me, and we get told, We're experiencing an Ectopic Pregnancy, and that I am experiencing internal bleeding. ( which turned out to be me losing more than 50% of my bodies blood)
I was rushed into emergency surgery, where they removed what was left of my fallopian tube. I woke up the next morning and looked like I had been stung by a hive of bees and feeling extra pale, and I remember thinking " Woah, my mascara does hold up well, almost died and my lashes still look good"
I almost died. And I don't say that lightly. All of this happened in less than one hour. The doctors kept saying " had you waited any longer to come, I don't know what would have happened" I had three blood transfusions in less than 12 hours. This entire situation had turned into so much more than a just a miscarriage, I was fighting for my life just hours before and I had no idea what was even happening.
Woah. Can you imagine how scary this is to hear? And all I could think about is how hard it must have been for Brandon and my Sister to hear that. Especially Brandon. Can you imagine losing your wife + your first unborn child? Can you imagine losing the person you love the most all while losing something you had worked so hard for and were so happy about?
I can't imagine how he was feeling in that situation, I can begin to fathom his emotions with everything we've been through this year in our personal lives, but I am just so so thankful for him. For his strength, for his ability to remain calm, for his love and I hope we are never put in a situation like that again.
I get to all of this because well, since posting on Instagram a few weeks ago B and I have received an amazing amount of love + support. I made the choice to share our story because I knew it would affect my job. I knew that I would need help, understanding, and support.
That's why I chose to share. So my friends/family and couples im working with this summer could see, I loved them but also that I am a real person going through real things. Things I can't control. My emails would be delayed, my work would take a back burner and something I dreaded, I'd have to step down from photographing another wedding in May.
I didn't want to explain my story 100 times, I didn't want to keep reliving what had happened, I still haven't even processed it fully I don't know if you ever really can.
I tried getting past everything the best I could. And I still am .I'm here to tell MY STORY. If you have a story, I encourage you to share your story if you have one. You don't have to share it with me. Or with anyone if you don't want too.
Write it down on a piece of paper. Fold it up in an envelope and tuck it away in a drawer and never look at it again if that's what you choose to do.
But tell your story. Let it be known that YOU WENT THROUGH SOMETHING. That you are strong, that you are loved, and that you will not let that hold you back from becoming an even greater person.
All photos taken by our fav photographer, Kayla Coleman. She photographed our Elopement so of course when we found out we were expecting we booked a shoot. We had originally planned for this to be an in-home shoot to announce our pregnancy, but decided to keep it after everything that happened to help document our life, perspectives, and outlooks after.
I wanted to give. little info at the bottom of this blog post for more info on what exactly and Ectopic pregnancy and what a miscarriage is. It is important to understand that these are two different occurrences, and no two people experience is the same.
I have been asked by SO MANY WOMEN, What an Ectopic Pregnancy even is. Did they save my fallopian tube?
** This is what happened to us, We were experiencing an Ectopic pregnancy. The fertilized egg never made it to my uterus and had attached to my left fallopian tube, it continued to grow and eventually ruptured **
RUPTURED. I HAD AN ORGAN EXPLODE IN MY BODY. ( Just saying this loud and clear so you can fully understand how an ectopic pregnancy can affect you)
During an ectopic pregnancy, the fertilized egg attaches to the fallopian tube or in another part of your abdomen. If the egg never made it to the uterus, the pregnancy can’t continue, and you would need immediate medical treatment. It’s estimated that this happens in about 1%-2% of all pregnancies. As the fertilized egg grows, you can experience the following symptoms:
Light vaginal bleeding
Pain in your rectum, shoulders, or neck
Nausea and vomiting
Pain on one side of your abdomen
Sharp abdominal pains
The March of Dimes estimates that up to 50% of all pregnancies end spontaneously before a period is missed or the woman even knows they’re pregnant. This is known as a miscarriage and happens any time before the 20th week of gestation. Most miscarriages don’t happen due to a problem with the mother. Usually, they occur when the baby had a genetic issue that was not compatible with life. Miscarriage symptoms are as follows::
Bleeding that progresses from light to heavy
Low back pain
** All the info I supplied was found through various online sources! **
Have any more questions? drop them below, and I’d love to help anyway I can! <3